Coronation Street spoilers for the week ahead sees news for Tina from a most unexpected source: Steve.
Tom Daley's Splash! on ITV: Anthony Agogo's a go-go!
Dom Jolly and Anthony Agogo in ITV's Splash!. Image. ITV
Week three of Tom Daley’s Splash!, ITV's widely ridiculed diving series, and we're over halfway through a show that's proven to be a surprise hit with over five million viewers watching.
Jumping into water this week were interior designer Linda Barker, Olympic boxer Anthony Ogogo, Shameless (the capital letter is optional) actress Tina Malone, leggy TV presenter Donna Air, and tubby comedian Dom Joly.
The most painful moments tends to be the most memorable; watching poor Dom Joly top three weeks of solid training with his worst ever dive (over-rotating for a back-slapping splashdown) was this week's bit of delicious schadenfreude.
I'm not her biggest fan to begin with, but Jo Brand's presence on the judging panel has gone from absurd to boring. Her self-deprecating gags may raise the odd smile, but after three weeks, the joke's wearing very thin.
Last week, Tom Daley's Splash! unquestionably improved from its horrendous opening episode; this week maintained that same quality.
The trouble now is that the format and timetable of each 90-minute episode has taken firm root, so the show as a whole is starting to go stale.
"The show as a whole is starting to go stale."
At least when it was outright bad, you didn't know where things were going.
But now Splash! just floats along and we know it's heading for a pointless finale in a fortnight's time.
It's hard to imagine a celebrity launching a career comeback based on an appearance in this show (unlike I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here!), so I don't even know what the attraction is from their perspective.
No, that's a lie. I do - it's the money. And in Tom Daly's case, a desire to move into television presenting.
Resigned to Splash!
Vernon Kaye and Gabby Logan appeared slightly more at ease this time, too. Perhaps they've just resigned themselves to the sheer ridiculousness of Splash!, comforted by the fact that it's not a ratings disaster?
Will you carry on watching Tom Daley's Splash! on ITV?
Thanks for being one of the first people to vote. Results will be available soon. Check for results
- Yes - it was exciting
- 70 %No - it was terrible
It's a shame they're still lumbered with a script Bruce Forsyth would reject as too cheesy. And whoever's decided Gabby looks great in a variety of luminous dresses needs to be quietly drowned off-camera.
The strange thing is, I can sense a half-decent show in Splash!
If the celebrities were allowed to dive more than once, if the timeslot was reduced to an hour, and if Jo Brand was removed from the judging panel (she only seems to be there to award sympathy points), I think Splash! may start to work.
Millions of people are watching - mostly for Tom Daley, I'll bet. But I'm not sure how many are also tuning in because bad word-of-mouth piqued their interest as hate-watchers of junk TV.
And I also can't tell how many of these viewers are mums and dads looking for the type of background noise that allows them to occasionally drool over Donna Air's legs and Anthony Ogogo's chest.
I also have no idea if some viewers have a strange fetish for 1920s-style male swimwear sported by Omid Djalili and Dom Joly.
Splash! is still a sodden and wretched viewing experience half the time, but it's perhaps enough of a hit to justify a rethink for next year in order to come back a leaner, keener version of itself.
- Verdict: Splash! isn't the best show on TV, but it is what it is.
What other reviewers said
The Mirror: "An ocean-going disaster that revels in its own ineptitude. So bad it's crap."
Daily Mail: "ITV's celebrity diving show Splash! remains worryingly amateurish and unwatchably bad."
What people on Twitter said
@charltonbrooker (Charlie Brooker) - "They should do a version of Splash where the pool is empty and the stars have to fill it with their own urine, vomit, etc on the way down."
@NatalieGumede (Coronation Street actress) - "My name's Natalie and I need to reassess my life. I just checked what time #Splash was on *hangs head in shame*"
The views in this article are those of the author alone and not of MSN or Microsoft
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